Yes, I Know This Is Just a Cartoon

I like to think that I don’t waste energy getting offended.  I once owned three volumes of Truly Tasteless Jokes and I love South Park.

So I was a little surprised when I felt uncomfortable and almost angry at a religious cartoon in Episcopalians on Facebook, so much so that to try to figure out my feelings I am writing a post (Or is it a rant?) about it.

 

 

I have always been told that it was rude to ask what a person “did”, but I never agreed with it, even in the sense of asking about someone’s job.  Since you probably spend eight hours a day at it, you should have some opinions or stories to share.

But the last two panels seem rude.  There is a condescending smugness as the tie guy (Let’s call him Ty) corrects the other person (We can’t tell if it’s male or female, so he or she can be Pat):  “Oh, I didn’t mean what you do for money.”  (You get the feeling that he wants to add, “Stupid.”)  Then he sounds like the Pharisee who gave thanks that he was not like “that pitiful tax collector” (Luke 18:9-14, my paraphrase) as he explains “I mean what do you do for the world?”

Why did he have to know?  It may be all right for a pastor to ask that question, but Ty is not wearing a collar.  It seems that he is setting Pat up to be the object of his criticism.

The fact Pat is a cashier adds to the discomfort.  Would Ty have asked the question of a pastor or doctor or teacher?  To Ty, a person who works in a store, living off America’s obsession with consumption and who did not need a degree to get the job needs to be made aware that there are more important things than making money.  This is insulting.  We could even call it classist and politically incorrect, but I'd rather just complain about rudeness.

We can and many of us do do things for the world.  We can treat people kindly.  We can do charitable or political work.  We can pray.  In fact, we can offer our work as an unceasing prayer.  But we don’t need or want to be quizzed about it.

How long would Ty last as a cashier on Black Friday or even a regular Friday night?

If this is Ty’s first date conversation, I don’t think he gets many second dates. 



Episcopalian Rap-- Really!



We love our church and we cannot lie

Episcopalians can’t deny

With the smells and the bells                                                           

When you’re in your place                                                          

With a prayer book in your face

You won’t be bored,

When we glorify the Lord!

 

We never falter

When we go up to the altar.                                                          

And we don’t mind it

If you get behind it

Because the presence of God

Is where you find it!

 

Our priest wears a collar

But we won’t holler

If you dress really dapper

Or like a rapper

Or an nerdy Bible scholar.
 

 We baptize babies!
                                                                                                                         

We ordain ladies!  

    

 

 

 

                                                                                                            

 

                                            

We’ll bless your cat!                                                           

And more than that

We’ll bless your backpack.

And that's a fact, Jack.

Do we have a Pope?

Nope!

But we have got faith and hope.                                         

And from above                                                                        

                                                                                                           

The Lord sends down his love.

 

So fellas!  Ladies!

If you don’t want to go to Hades                                                       

               

 And you’re looking for a church

That won’t leave you in the lurch

But you don’t know what to do --

The Episcopal Church welcomes you!                                                                     

                                                                          
 

Alleluia!

(Ending for Lent and Advent:  The Lord Be With You)

 

 

 

Apologies and Thanks to Sir Mix-A-Lot

 

Does anyone want to make a video?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bold and Brazen Articles

The first time I heard the introduction to the Lord’s Prayer “And now, as our Savior Christ has taught us, we are bold to say” during the service, I was puzzled.  Is praying bold?  My Catholic friends talk about being called “bold and brazen articles” by the nuns and ordered, “Present your hand,” which the nun then hit with a ruler.  Bold was wearing short or tight skirts and calling boys.  Bold was prank calling anyone.  Bold was talking back to your parents or teachers.  Bold was kind of cool, even if, like me, you weren’t bold enough to be bold.

(Don’t worry, this is not going to turn into one of those annoying rants about much better the boomers were raised.  I don’t think it’s true, and anyway, those days are over.)

One place you certainly weren’t supposed to be bold was church; you sat quietly and prayed silently.  And if you asked for something, you apologized first for asking.

We didn’t have problems asking our parents for things (better known as Stuff, as in “You have enough Stuff.” or “Get your Stuff out of here.”): toys, bikes, trips to the mall or Disneyworld, and later clothes, money, and cars.  We didn’t have problems asking repeatedly, or even without ceasing.   Our parents would get tired of this, but it still didn’t stop us.  They’d already said no, so how much could it hurt to keep asking?  Maybe we’d catch them in a weak moment if we’d worn them out enough.

One of the most memorable things I’ve taken away from a sermon was being told to ask boldly, not in a weeny-whiney voice, “Please God, if it’s not too much trouble, would you mind . . .” I changed my way of asking for things.  I don’t know if I’ve had more prayers answered since then;  I didn’t think I’d be writing about it, so I didn’t keep track.  But I feel better about asking.

If we are going to be bold about asking for things, maybe it will lead us to be bold in other things.  We can pray for improvements and we can be bold enough to try to do something about them.  And we can pray for the boldness to do it.  (Of course sometimes all we can do is pray.  But prayer itself, as I have learned, is a bold act.)

When was the last time you did something bold?  Did you give money to a beggar when you were with a disapproving friend?  Cheer when you heard another state is allowing gay marriage?  Work as a volunteer in a political campaign, maybe even knock on doors?  Say that Pope Francis has come a long way, but he still has a long way to go?

And, lest I sound too goody-goody, occasionally, let’s be bold in asking for Stuff. 

Leading to D'Oh

In a post called “A Stroke or What”, (February 22, 2014) I wrote about some crazy stuff happening and ended the paragraph “And then I woke up.”  It might have been better to make this a separate paragraph, but as I explained I was afraid that would soften the impact.

How many times have you read a story or joke that is going along and then comes a new paragraph that starts “And then”?  Of course that’s when the action starts.   

We all have our “And Then” Moments.  “I was happy with my significant other and then I met . . .”  “I was a people person and then I got a job in customer service.”  “I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up and then my aunt took me to see Beauty and the Beast onstage.”  “I didn’t believe in God and then . . .”

And Then Moments are not Aha Moments, when suddenly something becomes clear to you.  I had an Aha Moment on the bus reading an article by a prominent Unitarian, who said she didn’t, or wouldn’t, believe anything unless it could be proven.  My first thought was, “My God, that’s so sad!”  Caught in the Unitarian labyrinth of unanswered or multi-answer questions, I didn’t know what to believe or what I wanted to believe.  In that moment, I knew that things did not have to be proven to me.  As the old joke goes, I was so surprised, I nearly fell off my unicorn.  I was a lot happier spiritually after that.  (The And Then moment had been when I decided to try the Unitarian Church because I heard it was a good place to meet guys.  It was, by the way.) 

Can you see what your And Then Moments are?  How many of your And Then Moments brought good things?  How many brought bad ones?   Can you see what they are leading up to?  Maybe you can.  Maybe you think you can.  But you may be surprised. 

 

But Wait! There’s More! This seems to bear repeating.

At first I was going to title this “Still More About the Decline of the Church,” but I wanted people to read it.  That's why I added pictures of kittens and puppies instead of churches with "CLOSED" or "FOR SALE" signs.

Everyone has something to say about the Decline, if not Death of the Church:  the church is user-unfriendly; attempts to make it user friendly have just dumbed it down; the church is not meeting people’s needs; the church is pandering to unchurched people by becoming a spiritual Disneyworld; the church is too hung up on details; the church is forgetting that details help us get the greater meaning.

In fairness, a lot of the articles do offer some suggestions.  The one that turns up most often seems to be that we must tell our stories.  And I agree.  This is what people want to hear and what will bring Jesus to them.  Who doesn’t like a good story?

But this is hard.  We are conditioned to “not intrude on another person’s space,” or more bluntly, “Stay out of other people’s business.”  We are cautious about revealing our own feelings.  (And unfortunately, in some circles that kind of sharing is an easy target for satire.)  And don’t even think about talking about religion.  It’s even ruder than talking about politics.

But we have to try.  We have to pray for the courage to do it. 

I suggest that every time someone writes something about the decline of the church and the need to tell our stories, he or she add an extra paragraph, or maybe even just a sentence about his or her own story.  Perhaps even put it in bold type or a different font.  Or when you’re having a Discussion or bull session about the church or God, tell your story.  I was going to say “church or God or whatever”, but bringing it up in talks about “whatever” can make you an Annoying Believer.  (You can read more about that in “You just might be turning into an Annoying Believer”,  posted on July 22.)

So:  I’d been going to church all my life, switching denominations and was even a fairly agnostic Unitarian.  Around 1998, I went back to the Episcopal Church, mostly because a church was just a block from my house and the Unitarian church was an hour away on public transportation.  I was saved this past June (yes, fifteen years later), when I realized during an internet argument with a bunch of atheists that I truly believed what I was saying.  I have been greatly helped by wonderful pastors, teachers, people in the small groups I belong to, and friends.  I’m a lot happier since this happened.  This blog tells more about my spiritual journey
.
As one of my therapists used to say, I invite you to take the risk.  (Yes, I realize that this sentence is an easy target for satire, but it needed to be said.   Feel free to get snarky if you want to.)  For the church and for yourself.