Monday, December 11, 2017

The Best Christmas Stress Post -- Ever! -- In the World!

 
 
 
 
 
 


 
 

In order to reduce my stress load this Christmas, I am reposting last year's Christmas Stress post instead of writing a new one.

Do you feel that Christmas is a disruption in your life?  Are you overwhelmed by trying to provide the best Christmas possible?  How do you feel when you read an article or hear a discussion on a talk show telling you that you shouldn’t try to create the “perfect” Christmas?  And don’t forget all those movies about a burned out parent (usually Mom) who has a revelation and cries and berates herself for not seeing the meaning of Christmas.  Do you feel guilty because you would have been satisfied with just “real nice”?  Or are you shooting for perfect and feeling guilty not only for not making it but for even trying?

No matter where you turn, someone is saying something about the stress of Christmas.  I stopped reading articles about how to avoid stress, since reading them and trying to put them into action just took up time and led to more stress.

Maybe we just ought to accept that fact that we are going to strive for “the best Christmas ever,” no matter what we read or see on television and hear in church.

But I have a thought.
Christmas disrupts our lives, just as it has disrupted the world.  Mary and Joseph had their lives disrupted; so did the shepherds and wise men.  When we decide to follow Jesus, our lives are going to be changed and change is disruption.  It is a miraculous disruption.

But wouldn’t it be nice to find a little peace?

Maybe on the 26th or the Saturday after Christmas, we can enjoy the leftovers, watch the DVD’s we got, and really read the Christmas cards and newsletters.  I’m going to keep the 26th in mind tonight as I wrap presents and worry about whether everyone will like them.



Saturday, December 9, 2017

Still nice!





A friend tells you they're going to Disney World or Paris or their granddaughter's dance recital and you say, "How nice!"



YOU JUST MIGHT BE AN EPISCOPALIAN!


If you get carried away, you may say, "Oh, how nice!"






Sunday, October 29, 2017

You're so annoying it's scary!


You insist on calling corn candy "Harvest corn candy" because you believe Halloween is just public relations for the Devil.  On Trick or Treat night you put a sign on your door saying that giving out treats is the work of Satan.

You just might be an annoying Christian!
 
 


 
 



Thursday, August 31, 2017

Holly heck, you're annoying!



If a friend says they wish their ex from Hell would get eaten by an alligator and go back there and you say, "He/she didn't mean it, God,"
Or, regarding your own ex, "I'm just praying that Jesus will come into her/his heart,."
(You can alleviate the annoyance by adding,  "And stop him from being such a jerk!!"  You  can use a stronger  noun or adjective (such a  ******  !!!!!!!!!)  as long as you tell God you don't mean it,)
YOU JUST MIGHT BE AN ANNOYING CHRISTIAN!




Thursday, April 13, 2017

Are you going to be this annoying in heaven?


Someone says something catty and then shrieks, "I'm gonna burn in Hell!"  You say, "If you think that, then why did you say it?"

Your friend says, "I was just joking," and you say, "Eternal damnation is nothing to joke about!"

YOU JUST MIGHT BE A REALLY ANNOYING CHRISTIAN!



Sunday, March 12, 2017

Back (Way Back) In the Day


I suppose a lot of people (well, some people) have been wondering what Woodstock Churchlady thinks about the last election. I know I have. I did my best to keep up; I watched The Daily Show and Saturday Night Live religiously, although I did not make it a sacred ritual or duty.

But mostly, I was reminded of the campaigns I had worked on: that of a friend who was running for Congress (She lost.), or my first campaign, of another friend who ran for the State Legislature. (He's still there.) And then there was another state legislator who had done so much for the District that they named the new community center after him, but he was indicted for using State computers for his campaign. (He was found guilty, but a lot of people had voted for him anyway.  They changed the name of the community center, though.)

I knocked on doors, handed out leaflets, wore the buttons and tee shirts. I ate the chicken and blocks of chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry ice cream at the political dinners, with the free pastel mints on the tables and the cash bars.

I really got emotionally involved when Walter Mondale ran for president with Geraldine Ferraro as vice president. I woke up on Election Day feeling like it was Christmas Eve and spent the day working on the campaign of my legislator friend, going door to door to remind people to vote (most of them weren't home) and sitting around listening to war stories of past campaigns and eating hoagies and potato chips provided by the candidate.

He won, but everyone else my friends and I supported lost. We were devastated and for awhile, nothing seemed “right”, as if “the times were out of joint.” But The Holidays arrived, and who had time to be upset? And then the next election season came around.

A lot of people may think the reminiscing about old battles is a waste of time when there is so much to be done. Others may say that they are getting too old for that stuff.

Whatever.























Thursday, March 9, 2017

Offer it up! Lenten Annoyances



Your friends are enjoying their religious identity, talking about what they've given up for Lent and debating whether Long John Silver's or Popeye's fish is better, and you tell them that it's not necessary to give up anything for Lent or not eat meat "because there are more meaningful and useful things we can do."

YOU JUST MIGHT BE AN ANNOYING CHRISTIAN!



Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Good Heavens! You're still annoying! 2



You claim you don’t know your zodiac sign, your significant other’s, or your children’s. If someone says anything about horoscopes, you say, “The stars don’t control our destiny.”

You just might be an annoying Christian!