Jesus loves the Kardashians. And you can, too!

For those who have been waiting to hear Woodstock Churchlady’s thoughts on Bruce Jenner’s interview with Diane Sawyer on his transition from male to female, here they are:

Bruce (right now he prefers to use that name and masculine pronouns) was honest, open, and even humorous.  He has been dealing with this since was a child, and it hasn’t been a Wheaties commercial to say the least.  He hopes that by being open about his situation, he will be able to help other transgender people.  He is optimistic that he will be OK.  He is also a Republican.

That’s really all that needs to be said.  Nothing is open for debate and nothing is anyone else’s business, except maybe the Republican part.  No one has the right to judge another person’s behavior, much less condemn it or clue us all in on God’s opinion.

Of course, much more is being said.  This is confusing stuff.  It may even be threatening.  If gender isn’t secure, what is? But what this all comes down to for those of us who are not directly involved and who don’t even know a transgender person as far as we know is that it’s all about us.  If we want to do something, we can try to learn from our observations and, it is hoped, be the better for it.

Most of the reactions I’ve read have been positive, applauding Bruce’s courage and wishing him well.  People will be praying for him and his family and maybe all transgender people and those who love them.  However, there is also the theme, “I was leery about watching because I really didn’t want to subject myself to anything having to do with the Kardashians.”  People don’t like the Kardashians.  They see them as publicity hungry parasites who have perfected the arts of being famous for being famous and flaunting their excessive lifestyle into a million (Or is it billion?) dollar empire.

I’ve written about the Kardashians in two posts already (“A Look at Popular Culture”, October 11, 2014 and “Reality Check:  The Redeeming Social Value of Keeping Up with the Kardashians and the Real Danger the Real Housewives”, January 11, 2014).  If it hadn’t been for the latest development, I would think I’d said enough.  But even as I try to get away, they keep pulling me back.  An enormous fairy tale wedding and a marriage that lasts 72 days?  Well, these things happen.  Then another marriage.  Well, no one wants to be alone for the rest of her or his life.  And another enormous fairy tale wedding!  I know it’s none of my business, but . . .  Anyway, I love weddings, and it was fun to watch.  And some of us who feel we know better than to go chasing after happiness in the form of stuff still enjoy looking at other people’s and being proud that we are not envious.

Thinking about the Kardashian lifestyle, I was reminded of The Great Gatsby, with its gigantic mansions, weekly parties with full orchestras, and stables of polo ponies.  And, of course, the emptiness of it all.  But there is a difference. Unlike Gatsby, who was a bootlegger, the Kardashians have earned their fortunes honestly.  And, in spite of the excess, The Great Gatsby is about the search for love.  So are the Kardashian sagas.  And, in spite of everything, the Kardashians value family.  They fight, but they make up.  They make sex tapes that go viral on the internet and get DUI’s, but the prodigals are not thrown out. 

The Kardashians do not need me to defend them.  And I am not going Churchlady on people who don’t like the show or saying that hating someone’s lifestyle or television show means that you hate them.  But if we are thinking about Bruce’s journey, we can also think about the journey his family is taking and how, since it comes down to being all about us, we can learn from it.  Maybe even become better people.

(By the way, in case you’re wondering why you would want to love the Kardashians, maybe if you do, you won’t find them so annoying.)

Oh, Honey!

 

We’ve all dealt with naysayers and parade rainer oners, those people who say you shouldn’t major in English, look for new job, fall in love, or even get a new television.  One of the best ways to bring them out is to become a Christian, or, if you come from a nominally religious family, to “really get into it.”  Your best friend becomes an expert on church history.  What about the Spanish Inquisition?  Indulgences? Henry VIII? Bloody Mary?  Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker?  Another tells you horror stories about Catholic school – never mind that you aren’t Catholic.  Still others will be refreshingly honest.  How can you believe that crap?   

While these people are annoying, you can deal with them.  You can tell yourself that they have issues and don’t have manners, and just because they are being judgmental, you don’t need to be.  You can save your religious side for your religious friends.  You can say, “Well, we’ll just have to agree to disagree” and change the subject.  That works sometimes.  Or you can suggest going out for pizza.  Maybe they won’t talk with their mouths full.

 

What is harder to deal with are the “Oh, honeys.”  The Oh honeys are genuinely concerned and don’t come right out and criticize:  “You’re going to marry that whack job?” or “Churches just want your money.”  Instead they look worried and say, “Are you sure you want to do that?”  Or “Well, if you’re happy, I’m happy.” Or “Call me if you ever need to talk.”  You really don’t want to be rude and you know you really should appreciate their concern.  But you can hear the “Oh, honey” in their voices.  “Oh, honey, you’re making a big mistake.” 

I never thought I would become an Oh, honey.  But I have.  When I hear young people talk about the power of prayer or how we are all children of God, I want to say, “Oh, honey, it doesn’t always work out.  Sometimes the answer to a prayer is ‘Not now’ or even ‘No.’   Sometimes disgusting, evil laws are passed no matter how hard we work against them.  Sometimes no matter how much compassion and love we give someone, he or she may keep doing the same self-destructive things and if we’re not careful, take us down with them.”   And one time I did.  The young woman I said this to (Fortunately, I did not say “Oh, honey.”) is much more spiritual and knowledgeable than I am and I am old enough to be her grandmother.  She replied that she knew that; she is young, not dumb, but she still chooses to hope because she would prefer a broken heart to a hard one

She’s right of course.  We must continue to hope, about our dreams, about the world.  Even about retaining our faith.  What can we do to keep hope? We can surround ourselves with people who feel the same way we do.  (We can do this without putting those who don’t out of our lives.  Anyway, they wouldn’t go quietly if we were to try.)  We can get closer to God through reading the Bible and talking about it.  We can remember when the answer to our prayers has been “Yes.”  Or when the answer has been “No” and six months later we are relieved and even happy about that.  We can think of all the progress that has been made on issues, even though it is not nearly enough.  And we can pray – for the naysayers, for the Oh honeys and for ourselves. And that may give them hope.  I may be old, but I hope I’m not dumb.